Brain Noise

Good morning, Happy Monday! All that jazz. Trying to sit here quietly, with my 20 tabs open AND watch a movie. All on my laptop mind you. (Excuse me while I go check Twitter again). Ok, I’m back!

I felt this coming on last night. I was away for 24 whole hours. With my middle brother’s Grandmother (who has become one of my adopted grandparents over the course of the last 25 years), and 2 of my ducklings. All the way on the other coast of Florida. In a little house, with no heat and literally no noise. Like had to use an app on my phone to make noise while I slept (sad I know). So the girlies and I got back yesterday about 2 pm. It was Sunday, so of course I had homework due! Eventually buckled down and got that done. We had a beautiful dinner put on by my lovely husband. It crept closer and closer to bed time, and my brain got louder and louder. The whispers crept in “tomorrow is Monday………. you haven’t done the laundry……. what are you going to pack for snack……… Tuesday is grocery day……. Tuesday N-tot at speech……” so on and so forth. Sunday is usually spent getting ready for the upcoming week. So yeah, that didn’t happen so much. As you can imagine, for a person that thrives on routine this was not cool. Eventually I talked myself down, got some laundry done (Mr had started it at least, earlier in the day), and eventually got to sleep.

Fast forward to this morning. I was good. Got kids 2&3 on the bus, kid 4 taken to school, and then kid 1 on her bus. Kid 5 ate breakfast 3 times (reasons we’re always broke). Then it started. Standing there, with my coffee (#2) and laptop at the coffee bar in the kitchen and it started to creep back in. It was almost like I could feel my brain jumping around in my head. From one thought to the next. One task to another; kitchen floor, grocery list, nails look awful, laundry to be folded…. blah blah blah. Decided to sit. Opened up twitter, fb, pinterest. Messaged the Mr. Started a movie. Grabbed a notebook to shut my brain up. Dug the pen out. Now, I’m sitting here. My movie is buffering (thanks comcast). I’ve put the coffee down. My brain still will not STFU!

Now, I do have a touch of ADD I’m sure. Somedays it’s truly evident. Like no matter how many lists, or phone reminders I just can’t finish one thing. This is not what I’m feeling. I also have generalized anxiety disorder. Also, not at all what this is. I feel calm and mellow. It’s just. my. brain.

This post is totally pointless, but I felt like I needed to write it all out and throw it into the universe for no real good reason.


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